thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just crazy horny about you
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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