I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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