I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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