Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize