if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
sarcasm needs its own font
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after