I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
