yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
