I want to stick my p in your. b.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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