it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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