just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
