Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize