VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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