Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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