It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
And then my night got REAL pukey
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
