whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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