idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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