I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
