I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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