it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
