Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
