He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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