At least make sure they are 18
Why
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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