Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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