I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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