No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
