Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
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i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
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And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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