Duck Duck Cougar?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize