My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
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