just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
