You're so nebulous sometimes
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize