when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
the raccoons are back...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize