we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize