You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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