Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
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