they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
