I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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