4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
