R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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