So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
