Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.