theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
