I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
