she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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