hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
