After last night, I could never be a politician.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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