I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You've changed since you got that strap on
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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