I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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