If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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