I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
