So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
