After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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