I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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