I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize